Somewhere between the night feeds and the endless washing, you might catch your reflection in the mirror, peering back at you from behind a pile of dirty babygrows, and ask yourself the question that you haven’t dared ask out loud… Where did I go? Trust us, we’ve all wondered it, but here’s what we’re learning: she’s still there, she’s just making some adjustments - to become an even better version of herself.
Beneath the overwhelming love for our little ones, the sense of loss for a previous life is more common and more nuanced than we realise. Maybe you’re mourning your freedom. Your social life. Time to yourself. Your career. Your relationships. Your old routines. Standing for something other than ‘Mum’. But the key to reclaiming your identity is not about rejecting your new one as a mother - it’s about making room for both.
Take a moment to think about what you feel you’ve lost; some changes we embrace, but some things are not worth losing. What will you prioritise reclaiming, and how will you go about carving out time for it? It will take compromise, time to refine the juggle, and a joint effort with your support network. But it will be worth it. Things won’t look exactly as they used to, but why would you want them to? You are not lost - you’ve just levelled up to an even more accomplished, superhuman version of yourself.
